Change and transition – How to help your child adjust to their new school

A belated but heartfelt welcome to all our new families and Year 7 parents. I have seen many students in brief transition interviews and have been delighted to observe how resilient and adaptable they are. The process of transition into Bangkok Prep secondary school is far from over though and I hope this short article will go some way to developing understanding of what our newest students may be going through.

Change is an event, in this case a change of school, change throws us into a state of transition. Transition happens over time and is a psychological process. We are all individuals so the process looks different for everyone but research shows there are certain key emotions that most of us will pass through.

Change is a part of life, learning to cope with change and to see it as part of life, rather than something to be afraid of, builds resilience and the ability to cope. Changing school is a major event in a child’s life. In adolescence, when friends become increasingly important, changing a whole friendship group can feel extremely traumatic. Some of you will have changed countries, not just schools so you also have new cultures, customs and traditions to negotiate.

On top of this many of the children will have a learning transition to cope with. Your child may have significant gaps in their knowledge or have language challenges. If they are finding the academic side of school extremely difficult you may need to speak to their form tutor or year leader. Below I hope you find some useful advice in how to support your child during this time of transition.

• Prioritise relationships with friends and family, arrange times to speak across time zones.
• Prioritise sleep, students need at least 9 hours of sleep and adults 8 hours. When we sleep enough our brains are clear and we have a stronger perspective. Transition is a steep learning curve so sleep is even more important.
• Make sure you are linked into the parent communication portals. Do you know how to help your child sign up for ECAs? Don’t overdo ECA’s though, remember your child may be tired and benefit from down time.
• Turn anxiety into excitement. Humans have a tendency to think negatively and catastrophize, try, “I hear you are worried about the residential trip but you’re going to make lots of new friends and do some cool things…..” Show them how to reframe things positively.
• Make space to talk about what they lost. Old friends, teachers, places. Let them know that sadness is important, if they are sad it is because they valued and cared about the thing they lost, this is a good If they are not sad that’s okay, perhaps it was time to move on.
• Express feelings. Journaling is a great way to express difficult feelings, if they want to do it through other creative ways like music, art, photography then that’s great too.
• Confidence game. Encourage your child to present themselves really well (even with a face mask!) when you look confident more people are attracted to you.
• Even if they are suffering, encourage them to come to school -staying away makes school an even scarier place. If they are struggling please contact their form tutor, year leader or the secondary school counsellor

I hope your child is feeling part of the community and has made a good transition to Bangkok Prep but, if they haven’t, please feel free to contact me.

Claire Ireland

Secondary School Counsellor

cireland@bkkprep.ac.th